Keeping Her Baby's Secret Read online

  “Cam,” she said firmly, shaking his shoulder. “Come on, wake up.”

  “Okay,” he murmured, but his eyes didn’t open.

  This made things a bit awkward.

  Slipping out of the car, she went to the door and looked at the brass handle, loath to try it. She knew it would be locked, and she assumed there was a security system on the house. Everyone was obviously still asleep. What the heck was she going to do?

  Stepping back, she looked up at the windows, wondering if she could climb up and get in that way, then picturing the embarrassment as she hung from a drainpipe, nightgown billowing in the breeze, while alarm bells went off all through the house. Not a good bet.

  Turning, she went back to the car and slid into the driver’s seat.

  “Cam, I don’t know what we’re going to do,” she said.

  He was sound asleep and didn’t even bother to twitch. She sighed with resignation. She was going to have to wake up the whole house, wasn’t she? Now she regretted having come without changing into day clothes. But she hadn’t been sure she could keep Cam in one place if she left him to go change, and she’d thought she would just drop him at his doorway and make a run for home. She should have known nothing was ever that easy.

  “Okay. If I’ve got to do it, I might as well get it over with,” she said, leaving the car again and going back to the door. Her finger was hovering half an inch from the doorbell and she was bracing for the sound explosion she was about to unleash on the unsuspecting occupants, when the door suddenly opened and she found herself face-to-face with Cam’s sister, Janey.

  “Diana? What in the world are you doing here?” she demanded.

  “Janey!” Diana was immediately aware of how odd she must look standing on the Van Kirk doorstep in her filmy nightgown and fluffy white robe. The shabby slippers didn’t help, either.

  Janey, on the other hand, looked trendy and stylish in high end jogging togs. A tall, pretty woman about a year younger than Diana, she was evidently up for an early morning run and determined to look chic about it. Diana couldn’t help but have a quick catty thought wondering which of the local squirrels and chipmunks she might be trying to impress. But she pushed that aside and felt nothing but relief to have a member of the family appear at the door.

  She and Cam’s sister had known each other forever but had never been friends. Janey had been aware of the close ties between Diana and her brother, and she’d made it very clear in very public ways that she didn’t approve. But that was years ago. When they saw each other now, they weren’t exactly warm, but they were perfectly civil.

  “Janey,” Diana said, sighing with relief. “I’ve got Cam in the car. He was in an accident.”

  “What?”

  “Not too bad,” she reassured her quickly. “He seems to be basically okay, but I think a doctor ought to look him over. And…well…” She winced. “He’s been drinking so…”

  “You’re kidding.” Janey followed her to the car and then they were both fussing over her brother.

  “Cam, you blockhead, wake up,” Janey ordered, shaking his shoulder. “We haven’t seen you in years and this is the way you arrive?”

  He opened one eye. “Janey? I thought I recognized your dulcet tones.”

  She shook her head. “Come on. I’ll help you up to your room. I’m sure Mother will want to call Dr. Timmer.”

  “I don’t need Dr. Timmer,” he grumbled, though he did begin to leverage himself out of the car. “If Diana can take care of herself, I can take care of myself.” He tried to pound his own chest and missed. “We’re a pair of independents, Diana and I.”

  Janey gave him her arm and a quizzical look. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she said crisply. “Come on. We’ll let your friend get back to her…whatever.”

  “Diana is my best friend,” he murmured, sounding almost melancholy. “My favorite person in this valley. Always has been.”

  Janey chose that moment to notice Diana’s baby bulge. Stopping short, she gasped. “Cam! Oh, no!”

  Despite his condition, he immediately recognized the way her mind was trending and he groaned. “Listen, Janey, I just got into town at about 2:00 a.m. Not even I could get a lady with child that fast.”

  “Humph,” she harrumphed, throwing Diana a look that took in everything about her pregnancy and the fact that she was running around the countryside in her nightgown, delivering a rather inebriated Cam to his old homestead. It was obvious all this looked pretty darn fishy to her.

  Diana almost laughed aloud. If Janey only knew the irony involved here. “Can you handle him without me?” she asked the other woman. “I’d like to get home and try to get some sleep. I do have an appointment back here with your mother at eleven.”

  “Go, go,” Janey said, waving a hand dismissively and turning away.

  But Cam didn’t turn with her. He stayed where he was, looking back at Diana. “I was just getting used to having you around again, Di,” he said. “A little later, when I’ve had some sleep…”

  “You’ll be busy getting caught up on all the family news,” Janey said quickly. “And learning to give up living like a drifter.”

  “Like a drifter?” Cam looked up as though that reminded him of something and Diana laughed.

  “Watch out, or he’ll break out into song on you,” she warned his sister as she turned for her car. As she walked away, she heard the Cam’s voice warbling, “‘Here I go again…’” She grinned.

  Cam was back. What did this mean? Right now, it meant she was full of sadness and happiness at the same time.

  “The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat,” she murmured nonsensically as she began the drive down the hill. A moment later, tears were streaming down her face and she had no idea why.

  But Cam was back. Good or bad, things were going to change. She could feel it in the air.

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  CHAPTER THREE

  CAM woke to a pounding headache and a bunch of bad memories. It didn’t help to open his bleary eyes and find the view the same as it had been when he was in high school. That made him want to close the world out and go back to sleep again. Maybe he would wake up in a better place.

  No such luck. He opened his eyes again a few minutes later and nothing had changed. He was still a wimp for having let himself be talked into coming back here. Still an unfit driver for having crashed his car just because of a freak tire blowout. Still an idiot for having had too much to drink and letting it show.

  And still bummed at finding Diana more appealing than ever and at the same time, totally unavailable. Life wasn’t exactly glowing with happy discovery for him right now.

  Then there had been the humiliating way he’d returned to the green green grass of home. His mother had tried to pretend he was fine and gave him the usual hugs and kisses a mother would bestow upon a returning miscreant. But, his father barely acknowledged his return. And Janey was plotting ways to undermine him and making no bones about it. He groaned. The outlook wasn’t bright.

  There was one more gauntlet to brave—the most important one right now—his grandfather. There was no point in putting it off any longer.

  He made the water in his shower as cold and stinging as he could stand. He needed to wash away the previous day and start over. Maybe if he could just start fresh…

  But he already knew it was going to take all his will to be able to stay and do what he’d promised he would do—save the family business, and in so doing, hopefully, save the family.

  Funny that it would be up to him. When he’d left ten years before, his grandfather had just disowned him and his father had refused to take his side. His mother was upset about his choice of friends, and his sister was angling to take over his position in the family. To some extent, a somewhat typical twenty-one-year-old experience. But it had all been a culmination of years of unhappiness and bad relations, and something had snapped inside him. He’d had enough. He was going and he was never coming b
ack.

  Leaving Diana behind had been the only hard part. At eighteen, she’d still been gawky, a coltlike girl whose antics made him laugh with quick affection. She thought she needed him, though he knew very well she was strong enough to handle things on her own. She was fun and interesting and she was also the only person who seemed to understand what he was talking about most of the time.

  But that was then. Things were different now. Diana had proven she could make it on her own, no problem. She’d done just fine without him. And she now belonged to somebody else. She could deny it, but the facts were right there, front and center. She was pregnant. That meant there was a man in her life. Even if he was out of the picture for the moment, he was there. How could it be any other way?

  And all that was just as well, actually. Without that complication, he knew he could have easily fallen in love with her. He’d known that from the moment he saw her coming down to the lake, looking like an angel. He responded to her in a way he never did with other women, a combination of past experiences and current attraction. Yes, he could fall hard. And falling in love was something he was determined never to do again.

  For just a moment he thought about Gina, the woman he’d lived with for two years and had almost married. But thoughts of Gina only brought pain, so he shrugged them away.

  He needed to focus on the purpose of his return. He needed to get ready to face his grandfather.

  Diana parked in the same spot she’d used earlier that morning. This time there was a buzz of activity all around the compound. Workmen were putting new doors on the multiple garages and a painter was freshening up the long white fence that edged the driveway. Across the patio, two men were digging postholes for what looked to be a new barbecue center. With all this action, she could see she wasn’t going to need to contemplate a break-in this time. Sighing with satisfaction, she slid out of the car and made her way to the back entrance.

  She’d traded in her nightgown for a sleek pantsuit she’d picked up in Carmel a few months before. Luckily she could still fit into it. She’d chosen it out of her closet specifically to rival anything Janey might be wearing. It had a high collar and a loose jacket that hid her belly and she knew she looked pretty good in it—always a confidence booster.

  The back door was propped open and she went on into the huge kitchen, where Rosa, elbow deep in flour, waved at her from across the room.

  “Mrs. Van Kirk is out in the rose garden,” she called. “She asked that you meet her out there to go over some new plans.”

  “Fine.” She waved back at the cheery woman and headed into the house. She’d been here often enough lately to know her way around. This place that had seemed so special to her as a child, and then so scary when she was friends with Cam but never invited in, was now a part of her workspace.

  Walking down the long hall, gleaming with Brazilian cherry hardwood, she glanced into the library, and then the parlor, to check on the large arrangements she’d brought just a few days before. Both looked pretty good. Ever since she’d stressed to Rosa that the stems could use a trim and fresh water every few days, her masterpieces were holding up better than they had before.

  The Van Kirk mansion was beautiful in a way few houses could be. The quality of the original materials and workmanship shone through. The rich past and full history just added luster. It made her happy and proud just to be here, walking its beautiful halls.

  As she rounded the stairwell to head into the dining room and out the French doors, Cam surprised her by arriving down the stairs and stopping right in front of her.

  “Good morning, Miss Collins,” he said smoothly. “You’re back.”

  She cocked her head to the side and looked him over, fighting hard to suppress her reaction as her heart began a frantic dance in her chest. Here he was. It was really true. She hadn’t dreamed what had happened the night before. Cam was back in her life, just when she’d thought it could never be.

  He looked so good. Morning sunlight was even more flattering to his handsome face than starlight had been. Dressed in khakis and a blue polo shirt that matched his eyes, he looked hard and muscular as an athlete but gentle as a lover at the same time.

  The perfect man—hadn’t that always been the problem? She’d never found anyone better. It made her half-angry, half-thrilled, and practically hopeless. Now that he was back, what was going to happen to her peace of mind?

  One casual meeting and she was already straying into thoughts she’d vowed to stay away from. A simple look into that silver-blue gaze and her breath was harder to find and she was thinking moonlight and satin sheets and violins on the terrace. Given half a chance, she would be sliding into his arms, raising her lips for kisses….

  No! She couldn’t let that happen.

  Very quickly, so quickly she hoped he didn’t even notice, she pulled herself up short and forced a refocus. Cam was a friend and that was all he could ever be.

  So think friend, she ordered herself. Lover thoughts are not allowed.

  “Yes,” she agreed, putting steel in her spine. “I’m…I’m back.”

  His gaze swept over her. “You’re looking particularly lovely today,” he noted, a slight smile softening the corners of his wide mouth.

  The corners of her own mouth quirked. “As opposed to what I looked like yesterday, after midnight?” she said, half teasing.

  His grin was crooked. “Oh, no. After midnight you looked even better. Only…”

  “Did you see a doctor last night?” she broke in quickly, eager to forestall any flirting he might have in mind. They had to keep their relationship on a certain level and she was bound and determined she would be the watchdog of that if he wouldn’t be.

  “I guess so.” He shrugged. “I was pretty much out of it.”

  “Yes, you were.”

  Looking chagrined, he put his hand over his heart and gazed earnestly into her eyes. “I don’t drink, you know. Not really. Hardly ever.”

  If she wasn’t careful, he was going to make her laugh, and that was almost as dangerous as making her swoon.

  “So you said.”

  “And it’s true. If I’d found a box of crackers in the trunk of the car instead of a bottle of booze, I’d have been all crumbs last night, instead of the sauced serenader I devolved into.”

  She choked and his eyes sparkled with amusement at his own joke.

  “But I do want to apologize. I was rude last night. I took over your lake and ruined your sleep and generally made myself into a damned nuisance.”

  He meant it. He was really apologizing. She met his gaze in solemn candor. “You did.”

  “And I’m sorry.” His blue eyes were filled with tragic regret.

  She laughed softly, shaking her head. She’d missed him, missed his candor, missed his teasing and missed what often actually seemed to be his sincere sensitivity to what she was feeling. But she had to admit, that sensitivity could sometimes slosh over into a subtle mockery and she was afraid he might be working his way in that general direction right now.

  Still, they were friends, weren’t they? She was allowed to act like a friend, at least.

  “I’m not,” she said firmly. “I’m not a bit sorry.” She smiled up into his face. “Despite everything, it is good to have you back in the neighborhood.”

  “‘Despite everything,’ you say.” He looked skeptical. “Seriously?”

  Her smile deepened. “Of course.”

  The warmth between them began to sizzle and she knew it was time to pull back. But it felt like resisting quicksand to do it. If only she could allow herself this small island of pleasure. Soon enough she would leave and hopefully wall off any further contact with Cam, except the most casual and occasional kind. Would it really ruin everything to let herself enjoy him, just for this warm spring morning?

  Yes. He was looking at her mouth and it sent shivers all through her. She couldn’t risk even a tiny moment or two of weakness. Determined, she pulled away.

  “I drove by t
o look at your car this morning,” she said over her shoulder as she started to walk toward the French doors that opened onto the gardens.

  “How’s it doing?” he asked, walking with her.

  She glanced at him sideways. “You didn’t tell me you’d had a tire blow out.”

  “Didn’t I?”

  “No.” She stopped in the doorway, turning to face him again. “It’s too bad. I sort of liked your story about fighting the wheel in order to get to my place.”

  He snapped his fingers. “That was exactly what I was doing when the blowout occurred.”

  She grinned. “Right.”

  Mrs. Van Kirk, wearing a wide-brimmed sun hat and carrying a basket filled with cut flowers, was out among her prized rosebushes and as she turned, she spotted the two of them and began to wave. “Yoo-hoo! My dear, I’m over here.”

  Diana lifted her hand to wave back and said out of the corner of her mouth, “Who’s she talking to, you or me?”

  He stood beside her in the doorway, looking out. “I’d say it’s a toss-up.”

  She glanced at him. “She’s your mother.”

  His eyes narrowed suspiciously as he looked out at where she stood, waving at them. “Sometimes I wonder,” he muttered.

  Diana didn’t wonder. In fact, she didn’t have a doubt. Cam looked so much like his mother, it was cute—or frightening, depending on how you looked at it.

  “Well, I’m going to go to her,” Diana said, turning to leave.

  He hung back. “I’m not coming with you. I’ve got a command audience with my grandfather.”

  “Oh, no.” Stopping, she looked back at him. “Is this the first you’ve seen him since you came back?”

  He nodded, a faraway look in his eyes. “This should be interesting.”

  To say the least. Diana winced, remembering all those old, painful arguments with the old man when he was younger. She could see by the look on his face that he wasn’t as optimistic about the coming meeting as he might pretend.